Category Archives: family life

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a television journalist. I could see myself standing on the steps in front of the Capitol building or the Supreme Court, explaining the day’s political news. Wanting as much preparation as possible, I got involved in a local television show (Action News for Kids) and even anchored a primetime special (7:30p is primetime, right?) I knew how to dream big.

Sometime during high school, I began to realize that this might not work out. Good journalists work long hours, especially if I made it to the national level. I wanted to be a mom. I am not sure I have dreamed big very often since.

I am trying to think through jobs I might want to have in the near or distant future, and it is harder to dream big than I would have previously believed. Adulthood has made me practical. I’ve been a little surprised that I’m selling things in my etsy store (and several custom cards outside of etsy.) But it’s hard for me to dream big about owning my own business. I hate self promotion. It’s not a guaranteed stream of income (and not very much at this point.) But I like the flexibility.

Maybe I need to learn how to dream again. I’m not really sure how to go about doing that, but it’s worth considering.

I feel like this is as good an example as any of who Kate and Lexi are right now.

In their membership transfer interview, our new senior pastor asked them what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Kate said, “a scientist.”

Lexi said, “a rockstar!”

After saying she missed our old church every week since we moved, Lexi made it through the last two Sundays without complaining. This past week we went to an evening service at another church and she asked me why they didn’t start out singing “Come, let us worship the Lord, for we are His people, the flock that He shepherds…” which is what we sing every week at our new church to open worship.

I see the corner being turned for her at school as well. She really loves her teachers and has a lot of older kids she is attached to as well. It is so neat to see her with the sixth grade girls, who give her piggy back rides and make her feel special and cool.

It’s a little glimmer of hope that Memphis is incrementally feeling more like home. I can’t believe we’ve been here over four months now. It feels simultaneously like I’ve lived here for just a few weeks and I left Birmingham ages ago. We are still strangers in a strange land.

(If you didn’t win the winged feet etsy giveaway here, try over at Half-Pint Handouts, there are a few more days left to enter!)

We have been going-going-going lately and though it’s been fun, it’s also a little exhausting. It really cheered me up when coming home tonight to see that we’d been BOOed. We live in such a friendly neighborhood, which is very cool.

I still need to get costumes together for the girls, so blogging may continue to be light. But there is a big announcement coming next week… so stay tuned for that.

Yesterday, during the communion liturgy, Lexi leaned over to me and said, “I feel the most homesick during church.”

I had told a friend the exact same thing during my Birmingham visit. For me it is not the differences in hymn selection or preaching that make the biggest difference, but that feeling of looking around and realizing how few people I recognize, let alone know.

It is a hard thing to leave behind community, however imperfect. Even at five Lexi knew church as a place where she was known and loved, where she could run and play and be herself. Where her pastor would throw her up in the air moments after she received the benediction.

I hope she holds onto her fond memories, but makes room for new ones.

One of the girls told me on Sunday she hated Memphis and missed Birmingham, especially our old church. She kept repeating, “I just can’t handle it!”

Yesterday she woke up early with a smile on her face, and had a great day.

Life is like that. Feelings that come on with great intensity and fade as quickly as they arrive. Small triumphs, which will surely be followed by more bumps in the road.

I wish I had some great wisdom to share, and I really don’t. I spent a long time praying over her as she slept Sunday night, and I hope she feels the comfort of her savior, who cares for her. One thing I do know that we will survive. Jesus and her momma can handle a little pain-induced anger and grief.

You’ve probably noticed, today is the last day of August. This means:

(1) Fall is coming soon! I love cooler weather, leaves changing, apple and pumpkin flavors and basically all autumn has to offer. Lexi is already mentioning Halloween daily.

(2) We survived our first full month in Tennessee, M’s first month working and the girls heading back to school.

(3) I turn 30 this week. My parents are coming for their first Memphis visit. Still contemplating work and the future and being a grown-up in general.

Bring on September.

Kate and Lexi ran in their first race today, a one mile fun run. They were pretty excited about it.

Lexi ended up falling about halfway through and scraping her knee and hands pretty badly. But she persevered and finished. I blamed it on her chuck taylors and I think she’s over her initial “I’m never running again!” phase, as long as she gets some new shoes and nike tempo shorts. It’s all about the gear for her.

Kate is hooked, and I hope to start running with her regularly. She’s faster than I am, so I hope I can keep up and stay motivated to do it with her.