Things I’d Commend To You

S’Mores Pie: I use semi-sweet chocolate and large marshmallows (my kitchen is candy thermometer-less – birthday wish!) I broil the final step on low until the marshmallows are big and puffy and then high to brown. It’s easy and delicious.

Half-Pint Handouts: Megan gives things away. You can win them. I’ve won TWICE. Yay for her diligence in securing great giveaways and hurrah for winning things.

New Orleans Snowballs: My favorite summer treat, but since we moved away from Austin, we have not coexisted with a place. Apparently one just opened in Birmingham to mock me. If you happen to be lucky enough to live where they serve snowballs, get yourself one, stat.

Downton Abbey: Only 7 episodes long (each UK season series is too blasted short!) but so marvelous. Must see during the summer hiatus.

YouFace

Moving amplifies the truth of Aaron Sorkin’s statement “socializing on the internet is to socializing as reality television is to reality.” There are social networks I see the usefulness of (facebook, due to it’s size), others I enjoy (twitter, instagram) and some I don’t quite understand the niche yet (google plus.) When you use social networks primarily to connect with people you have relationships with, it feels like a natural extension of friendship. When you’ve moved away, it feels more like grasping for what was and won’t be the same again.

That isn’t to say that there is no value in keeping up with old friends on facebook, it just makes the natural detachment of moving much more strange. It certainly makes it easier to wish I were back in Birmingham doing x at y with z right at this moment.

Half the Church by Carolyn Custis James

Half the Church: Recapturing God's Global Vision for WomenHalf the Church: Recapturing God’s Global Vision for Women by Carolyn Custis James
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

So moved by reading Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn, Carolyn Custis James responded by writing a book that tackles God’s global vision for women. With clarity and insight, James sets out a theology of women that works both for affluent surburbanites and those in the developing world. Women matter to God, they are his beloved daughters, and that knowledge gives them a foundation to rest upon and strength to fight oppression and injustice.

James is challenging the church to answer three questions:

(1) What message does the church offer women in the twenty-first century?

(2) What will the church do to address rampant suffering of women throughout the world?

(3) What message are we sending to the world by how we value and mobilize our own daughters? (p. 41)

In answering the first question, James explains how women are made in the image of God, just as men are, are of great value. She also explains that God made women ezers, helpers. But unlike the docile doormats that many picture, Ezer is also the Hebrew word used to describe God’s strong help, how the mighty warrior defends and protects his people. Both men and women benefit and are at their best when they join together to serve the church and the world. I think her work in this area is invaluable to the church as an encouragement to women.

The second question is more of a challenge than anything else. Though James highlights some women who are fighting injustice around the world, there isn’t an easy solution to the problem of suffering and oppression and there isn’t an easy answer. I wish this had been more fully developed, and included more stories of women advancing the cause of justice and mercy.

More controversial than the other two, I appreciated the way James handled the third question. She established that it is wrong for us to equate biblical womanhood with being a wife and a mother, which are two good and valuable roles that we often elevate to the point of excluding and marginalizing other women. Her ministry is not for or against women’s ordination or a blanket egalitarianism, which is sure to frustrate those on both sides who would like to see her take a strong position one way or another. But I find it wise, as those with either conviction can learn a lot from James.

Half the Church could have been organized a little better, and integrated justice more clearly as well, but I still appreciated it. It is a good book, not a perfect one, but one that will encourage the church.

Housekeeping

I’ve been in a creative funk, one that even made reading difficult, for the first time in who-know-how-long. But I’m making progress, and blogging might just help me on my way. And so, I hope to be utilizing this space more often.

If you are accustomed to getting these posts via facebook, it’s been pretty spotty as of late, not posting for days or even a month. Of course, you can subscribe using a feedreader but I’ve finally added email subscription if that is most convenient, four years after the rest of the internets did. There’s a box on the right sidebar to do so.

I am very smitten with pinterest since our move. You can find me there and explore for yourself. Email me (first initial last name at gmail) if you’d like an invite to come join the fun.

Ordinary Time

A continuing series on celebrating the church year.

Ordinary Time is the rest of the church year, from Trinity Sunday just after Pentecost to Christ the King Sunday, which precedes the first Sunday in Advent. It gets it’s name from the word “ordinal” and refers to the counting of weeks, not the commonness of the season. I love how the Circle of the Church Year Godly Play materials refer to this long stretch of liturgical green as growing time. After we have been immersed in the seasons of Advent, Epiphany, Lent and Easter, each with a distinct focus, we have this large chunk of time that is not focused. This is a time when individuals, families and churches can discern where they need to grow and devote themselves to that.

If you take some time to prayerfully consider how you ought to use ordinary time in your family life, I’d encourage you to include your children as much as appropriate. Some brainstorming questions might include, “In what ways can we grow to be more like Jesus?” “What fruit of the Spirit seems to come to you least naturally?” “Are there any habits (spiritual disciplines) of Christians you’d like to learn more about and practice?” “What parts of the Bible do you feel least familiar with?” Obviously, as a parent one has some insight into this and you can use the time to focus on what you find important.

In the rhythm of the church year, ordinary time is a rest. Because of the length of time, you can be leisurely and not as intense with any goals you set. Also feel encouraged to take a break and reevaluate some of the spiritual habits of your family. If you are participating in a church summer activity (like scripture or catechism memorization) that may fall later in the season.

In Between

We’re in the middle of a move to Memphis, and there’s something about the spaces in between in life that give me a clear picture of who I’ve been, and who I want to be. Coincidentally, it is also within a few months of a milestone birthday, though I’ve felt 30 for quite some time — kids will do that to you. And so I am looking around, looking within, looking ahead. I am not quite sure what life will look like for me in a year, let alone five or ten. It seems time to plan realistically, but I want to bring hope and passion in the midst of pragmatism.

Birmingham has been good to us, and though not perfect, a place I had grown to love and see as home. But as I step away I see things differently. I hope I use this time in the margins well. That I am able to see clearly my sin and flaws, my gifts and passions, and learn some things to help me on my way.

Ascension and Pentecost At Home

A continuing series on celebrating the church year.

Forty days after Easter (so, this Thursday, June 2nd in 2011) is the day we celebrate the Ascension of our Lord. Most churches celebrate it on Sunday, so feel free to be flexible with the day. The following Sunday (10 days after Ascension) we celebrate Pentecost, the coming of the Holy Spirit, the birth of the church and the end of the season of Easter. Ascension and Pentecost remind us that we are part of a continuing story that did not end with Christ’s resurrection, and by celebrating at home, we connect our lives, churches and stories with the narrative of the church.

The most critical element of Ascension Day is helping kids to understand what happened. Reading the account in Acts 1 (verses 1-11) is a good way to remind them. Jesus rose from the dead, appeared to his disciples several times, and then ascended into heaven where he remains, sitting at the right hand of God the Father, serving as our advocate.

Good hymns to sing would be “A Hymn of Glory Let Us Sing” originally in Latin by the Venerable Bede, which can be set to the same tune as “All Creatures of Our God and King” and “On Christ’s Ascension I Now Build” which has a familiar Lutheran/Bach tune.

Many people take hikes up to the top of a hill near their city to commemorate the Ascension. I have seen it suggested several places to use helium filled balloons, such as releasing a group of white balloons with one colored balloon (green could represent everlasting life). Watching them drift onward and upward is a way to remember the Ascension.

Looking at paintings of the Ascension (like this one) are good conversation starters. What would it have been like to be there? On Ascension day there was one last promise of the Holy Spirit. You could wrap a small gift for the family to leave out until Pentecost. Any food that reminds one of clouds, from marshmallows to anything cut in a cloud shape, would be very festive. There is an old Anglican tradition of beating the bounds of the parish that would be cool for neighborhood oriented churches or small groups to use as a creative launch pad, such as walking around the bounds of your area together and praying for all who live there.

The account of Pentecost is found in Acts 2. It is equally important for children to hear and understand, a critical piece of the story of Christianity. Be sure to make a connection so that they understand the Holy Spirit that descended like fire is still here with us today.

It is traditional in many churches to wear red on Pentecost. It is a feast day, so it would be appropriate to gather and share a meal with members of your church. Some people take the fire theme to heart and grill out!

As it is the birth of the church, and fire is a huge part of the imagery of the story, a cake with candles could be very appropriate. You could decorate with candles and red streamers. I think we are going to bust out some sparklers if I can find them. We will also paint some pictures of the imagery of the story. It’s easy and fun to do crafts that represent flames. It might be neat to make different flames and label them with the fruits of the spirit.

Appropriate hymns include “Come Holy Ghost, Creator Blest” and “Spirit of God Descend Upon My Heart.” You can download mp3s with the tunes we use at our current church from Cardiphonia and check out some more Pentecost hymns.

Do you have any ideas for celebrating Ascension or Pentecost?

Hope

Our pastor preached a great sermon recently with the insightful title of “The Ideal, The Real Deal & The Gospel In Between.” I’ve been thinking lately about the hope we have, both grounded in the gospel and more beautiful than we can imagine. I don’t want to grow dull to longing for shalom for myself, for my neighbors, and for the world.

One of my few thoughts on the whole rapture debacle was that we are so quick to condemn, even in truth, but not always quick to pray “Come, Lord Jesus” and long for the new heavens and the new earth. Let’s hope together.

Holy Week and Easter at Home

A continuing series on celebrating the church year.

In Holy Week we have a unique entry point into the story of Jesus’ death and resurrection, and good church services have made memorable impressions on me over the years. Certainly utilize whatever your congregation is doing and ask friends how their church is celebrating as well.

Here are a few Good Friday printables I made you may want to decorate with. If you click on them you should be able to save and print them in high resolution.

Holy Week begins with Palm Sunday. Your church service may incorporate all of these elements but if it doesn’t, you can observe by reading the account (from Matthew 21 or Mark 11), singing an appropriate hymn such as “All Glory Laud and Honor” and waving palm branches (call around to florist wholesalers if you need to find them.) Save your palm branches for making crosses sometime during Holy Week.

The lectionary is always appropriate, and Gospel of Mark would make a good family devotion for Holy Week, reading 2 or 3 chapters a day. Also, the Lenten Lights devotional can be used for Holy Week, but you need to start the Saturday before Palm Sunday for it to line up. Families with young children might use resurrection eggs (google, there are some variations) for a nightly devotion, opening 1 or 2 each day and reading / discussing the appropriate scripture.

More protestant churches are offering stations of the cross or labyrinth prayer during Holy Week. You can also use the world-wide labyrinth locator to find one yourself. If you have school aged children, this might provide a good opportunity for quiet contemplation and prayer as you prepare for Good Friday.

Holy Week increases in intensity on Maundy Thursday. If you don’t have the opportunity to attend a service that night, you can read the story together from Luke 21:1-13, John 13:1-20, John 13:31-35 and Luke 22:14-62. You can enter the story by breaking up your reading by participating in some of the events such as washing each others feet, sharing bread and wine and going out into the darkness. Some families also use this night to have a Passover celebration. I’ve found that my Good Friday seems much more “real” after following Jesus through Maundy Thursday.

Crucifixion is not an easy topic to talk to children about, but without the cross, we don’t have the hope of Easter. Reading the Jesus Storybook Bible account would be a great start with a younger child. As your children get older, you can sing hymns like “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross” and read the account from one of the gospels (Matthew 27, Mark 15, Luke 23, John 19) and talk about it. What was it like for Jesus? How do you think the disciples felt? How does it make you feel? It might also be helpful to cultivate an atmosphere of quiet and darkness (close the drapes and keep lighting low) for Good Friday and Holy Saturday.

You can make an Easter garden with moss and found objects as a beautiful centerpiece, complete with a tomb to find empty Easter morning. I like this one. If you start early enough, you can also grow one with grass seed, like this blogger did.

Traditionally, Hot Cross Buns are made and consumed on Good Friday. There are other bread traditions such as Kulich which is served in Russia as part of the Easter meal, it would be fun to ask your grandparents if there are any special things they grew up making together during Holy Week and incorporating it into your Easter as well.

In the midst of family obligations and bustling activity, punctuate your Easter with joy. Borrowing from the Easter Vigil service in the Anglican tradition (an awesome liturgy, but long and often very late…) you could give each member of your family a bell and the first one to wake up after sunrise (or whatever time you deem appropriate) can run from room to room ringing it and shouting “Christ is risen!” as everyone else gets up to join them. Read a resurrection Sunday account while you eat your chocolate (Matthew 28, Mark 16, Luke 24, John 20) and sing something triumphant and appropriate together (“This Joyful Eastertide,” “Christ the Lord is Risen Today.”) Since our church meets in the evening, our tradition is to share lunch with other friends who have out-of-town family, and the feasting and fellowship is a huge part of Easter for our family.

Easter is not a day, but a season of resurrection that lasts for forty days. Doing something as simple as a small dessert every night (dark chocolate squares, fruit, store-bought treats…) could help to remind children of the joy of salvation. A special “Easter only” weekly tradition particular to your family would also be fun.

Here are some free Easter printables as well.

Feel free to share your traditions for making Holy Week and Easter meaningful and memorable in your home, there’s obviously much more than I can possibly mention.

Parenting, the Gospel, and MTD

Several days ago I tweeted “What’s best for our kids and what’s best for God’s kingdom generally aren’t mutually exclusive.”

I have thought about it every day since, in a variety of different situations other than the one that prompted my tweet. We want our kids to be safe, happy, and successful by American standards: well-educated, socially adept, able to earn a comfortable living. The problem is when we value those things above everything else, that’s what we impart to our children, as their beliefs are shaped by our actions more than our rhetoric. More and more American Christianity has turned to Moral Therapeutic Deism.

The fact that most Christian teens in the US believe the central goal of life is to be happy and to feel good about oneself should be very sobering to the church. The good news isn’t that if you work hard, you will be successful and happy.

I’m not sure how this fleshes itself out in everyday life, but our children have to know that though they are loved and valued, their happiness, comfort and safety are not the top priority in the life of our family.

We are united to Christ in salvation, and so we share in the great work he is doing in redeeming the world. We share in his sufferings, so we can share in his glory. How can that define our family life? What difference does the gospel make in our choices for our children?

Lent at Home

A Continuing Series on Celebrating the Church Year.

Lent is a season of repentance in preparation for Easter, which begins Ash Wednesday (February 22nd in 2012) and continues to Holy Week. It has been marked traditionally by fasting, prayer and acts of charity. In Lent, we reflect on such questions as: what routine sins are estranging me from God and other people? In what ways has my heart grown cold to the gospel? What idols of my heart are distorting my love for God?

Because the Lenten season is more somber in tone, it can be hard to know how to observe it at home with children. This post is a collection of ideas, certainly not a prescriptive list we are doing in full this year (or any year!) I’d love to hear what you’ve done in the past or plan to do in the future.

PREPARING FOR LENT
Shrove Tuesday, or Mardi Gras, is the day preceding Ash Wednesday. Traditionally, people used up butter, eggs, sugar and other things they might be giving up for Lent by making pancakes. I am planning to make these gingerbread pancakes to eat as we talk about our plans for Lent over dinner.

For me, Ash Wednesday services set the tone for Lent, the liturgy is powerful. They tend to have short homilies that are child-friendly at the Episcopal and Anglican parishes we’ve visited, and we’ve always felt very welcome even with wiggly toddlers or noisy babies. Sometimes less-liturgical churches will have Ash Wednesday services without the imposition of ashes, if you like the idea but not the ashes.

DURING LENT ITSELF
Make a commitment to confess your sins together as a family. With smaller children, this would be done orally, but you could write them out if you have teens and feel that would work better.

Memorize one of the Psalms of repentance that are traditional to the season of Lent: 6, 32, 38, 51, 102, 130 or 143.

Use prayers of confession like the familiar general confession from the episcopal church or this one from St. Ambrose at home.

After confession, you can foreshadow Easter by using hopeful affirmations of assurance of pardon and union with Christ, like this one from the Syrian Orthodox tradition: “How fair and lovely is the hope which the Lord gave to the dead when he lay down like them beside them. Rise up and come forth and sing praise to Him who has raised you from destruction.”

Fast from something: dessert, TV or another distraction. Perhaps introduce a few meatless days into your meal rotation. Don’t forget that Sundays are for feasting and remembering a resurrected Christ, even during lent. Break your fast and enjoy whatever you’ve given up.

Use meditative, breath prayers like: Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Read scripture! You can use the lectionary to guide scripture reading as a family. Decide how much time you can spend daily and plan accordingly (e.g. one psalm, the OT and the gospel.) If that’s too much, just read through one of the gospels together. If you aim to finish before holy week, you’d end up needing to read less than a chapter a day.

Pray throughout the day. You could make a commitment to the daily Morning, Evening and Night prayers (with the daily lectionary readings) from the Book of Common Prayer or use a resource like Phyllis Tickle’s The Divine Hours.

Learn the verses of a hymn of confession you sing in church. “Nothing But the Blood” is particularly good for pre-readers.

Here’s a playlist on Spotify of appropriate songs for lent.

Contemplate acts of service you can do as a family or individually. Consider giving to a ministry that serves the poor by freeing up money you might have spent on something else.

Make pretzels, a traditional lenten bread and reminder to pray.

Remind yourselves of how lent is a time of growth by planting seeds for your spring garden. Starting seedlings depends on your climate, germination times, etc. But it could line up well to plant the week after Easter if you don’t live in the frigid north.

Simplify your schedule or your possessions. Clear out things you don’t need, and give them to a local thrift store.

Do a devotional together. Noel Piper’s Lenten Lights is a weekly devotional that includes a candle component, we’ve not used it but it may be a good fit if you have smaller children and don’t want to make a daily commitment. If you have teens, Henri Nouwen’s Show Me the Way is a classic. Bread and Wine is a collection of readings from great writers for Lent and Easter. City Church, Philadelphia (PCA) has a good guide with scripture readings and prayer for each day during lent.

I made a few printables, for those of you who like to rotate seasonal decor with the church calendar. (If you click on them, they will open large enough to print at 8×10.)

Lexi’s Jams (an Update)

Last year, I gave you a peek into Lexi’s particular taste in music. Kate is a little musical sponge and likes a lot of different things, rarely asking for me to skip a song. She hasn’t been obsessively devoted to any one artist or genre since that Josh Ritter phase when she was three. So, all these songs also meet Kate’s approval, her list would just be really really long. Many songs are beloved because of their use in Ramona and Beezus, and their tastes are starting to be shaped by other people as well. But I still get last word on what gets downloaded (sorry Justin Bieber.)

Even though Lexi tolerates the rock and pop standards I rotate into their playlists much better than she used to, she refused to include any of them in this list. I thought “Wouldn’t It Be Nice” might make the cut or something by the Beatles. Nope. Truly, these are her choices. I don’t loathe any of these songs, but none of them are on my list of current favorites, either.

2011.02
Say Hey (I Love You) . Michael Franti & Spearhead
I Gotta Feeling . The Black Eyed Peas
Whip My Hair . Willow
Shackles (Praise You) . Mary Mary
Hello Seattle . Owl City
Live Like There’s No Tomorrow . Selena Gomez & the Scene
What I Am . will.i.am (sesame street)
Pack Up Your Troubles in Your Old Kit Bag . Minnutes
Edge of the World . Mat Kearney
A Place in This World . Taylor Swift
More to Luv . Minnutes
Everybody . Ingrid Michaelson
Over the Rainbow . Jason Castro