I didn’t grow up doing the Santa Claus thing, so maybe I don’t understand what I am missing, but we have avoided it thus far. We try to be minimalistic about gifts and possessions in general and it works for us. We decided to try to celebrate Saint Nicholas Day, and when we remember (I think it’s been twice in the last three years, thank you Google calendar) the kids set their shoes out the night before and find them filled with candy. We talk about giving gifts in secret and fighting for truth (“You can only hit heretics.”) But, speaking of the historical Saint Nicholas always leads to Kate asking if he is still alive. We’re trying not the be that family. This year we told them we only talk about Santa in our family, he’s our secret. Not sure how successful that will be. Any suggestions for how to handle this? Last year Kate told her best friend Santa was dead, but the friend did not believe her, worrying as they get older this will not work itself out so well…
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My family didn’t do Santa growing up, and it wasn’t an issue until we went to school. (My mom says that before then, people would say, “What did you ask Santa to bring you?” and I would just look at them because I didn’t know who he was.)
At that point, I think my parents explained that he was an important part of some people’s holiday but not ours and we were instructed NOT TO TALK ABOUT IT. So we didn’t. It worked out.
This year on Saint Nicholas Day, one of my kids said, “Saint Nicholas can’t put chocolate coins in kids’ shoes because he’s dead. The parents do it. Right?” My husband said, “Well, he’s alive in heaven.”
I sympathize with the problem. Brooklynne and I both grew up doing the whole santa thing, but we decided when we started having kids that we were going to downplay santa so we’ve been having the same debate about how to skip santa without making HJ the spoilsport for other families’ fun. It had not been a big issue, though, since HJ has not been old enough to understand–until this year.
Recently, a family member asked Halleigh what santa was bringing her, and she has started mentioning that santa is bringing her a dolly.
We thought about telling her that have enough, so we let santa take gifts to other families, but I’m not sure if that really accomplishes our goal of keeping Christmas more holy.
I know this doesn’t help, except to say that we’re in this spot together and that I will pass along any brilliant ideas if we have them.
Hey kristen. We don’t do Santa either (for several different reasons). With our kids (mainly Neily), there are a lot of questions because kids talk about it at school or we see santa at walmart or the mall. We talk about how santa is pretend (like tinkerbell) and some parents tell their kids that Santa brings them presents becuase it’s fun to pretend, but in the end everyone eventually finds out that he isn’t real. So for now we teach them to respect others beliefs and not to say Santa isn’t real. At home we don’t talk about him, only things relating to Advent. In 2 weekends we are doing Christmas with my family and my sisters little girl (5) is big on Santa. I hope we make it through the weekend with no major blunders!
I just read a friend’s post about this same issue: http://hollowayclan.blogspot.com/2009/12/santa.html
Personally, we grew up with Santa and aren’t necessarily against it, but don’t want to make it a big deal. I did love our family’s tradition of reading “The Night Before Christmas.”
So far, I think our oldest (not quite 3) thinks Santa is make-believe, just like the “monsters” or other imaginary friends he talks about. Although we haven’t encountered it too much this year. I kind of like the idea of believing in a real St. Nick, and read some really great notes on some reformed guy’s blog about why he believes “there really is a Santa Claus” but I need to find that link…
Anyway, we are still figuring out how to handle this as well, but we are definitely stressing that Christmas is about celebrating Jesus’ birth and so far, that’s what Jacob seems to be picking up on through story and song.